


Ruination

by xMidnightSun



Category: Original Work
Genre: (well more like just one arm but still), Gen, Loss of Limbs, Morally Nihilistic Fallen Angel, Semi-important Character Death, fall from grace, slow descent into madness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-20
Updated: 2013-07-20
Packaged: 2017-12-20 20:32:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/891543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xMidnightSun/pseuds/xMidnightSun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Asgeir Madsen. You used to be the pinnacle of purity; a Guardian Angel who watched over mankind with caring eyes and open arms.</p>
<p>Now you've long since Fallen from Grace, and you're going to make her pay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ruination

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LaMademoiselleRouge (ItsyBitsyBosmer)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsyBitsyBosmer/gifts).



When you were younger, you'd dreamt of becoming a powerful, well-respected Guardian, just like all the others of your age. You believed you were created to be great. Of course, being an angel, you'd had to push those thoughts down in favor of angelic humility. You had loved your charges, as you were expected to, and you protected them as long and as well as you could.

Of course, one or two of them died because of your inherent faults, but He was forgiving. He gave you another chance.

Then, one day, you met a demon.

This demon was, initially, just like all the others. Rude. Cruel. Distinctly corrupted by the realm he hailed from. By all means, you should have been just as disgusted by him as you were by all the others.

Yet, you were not.

The demon, Eyvindur, intrigued you. Though you first tried to push him away, he continued coming back again and again and despite your best efforts to ignore him and continue about your own business, you found yourself drawn to him more and more as time went on, and the two of you became closer and closer despite your best efforts to push each other away.

Then, one day, your feelings for each other ruined you.

It had been a mistake, a lapse of judgement. You broke your vow, not just once but twice, and though He had forgiven you the first time, you were terrified of what He might do when you made the very same mistake a second time. And, acting on your emotions and your fear of your Lord, you made a horrible mistake and turned your back on God.

You signed a contract.

At first, you were relieved. Now that your soul belonged to Hell, you could not be punished by God's punishing judgement. Yet, slowly, your relief faded, replaced by regret as each day, you were forced to look upon your ashen wings and remember your mistake. Despite Eyvindur's best efforts to reassure you, you never quite recovered. Always, something felt as though it was missing inside of you, as if by abandoning your God, you abandoned part of yourself.

Eyvindur tried to comfort you. By God, did he try.

Eventually, however, you decided you could not endure this horrible guilt any longer. You waited for Eyvindur to leave for his own duties, and then you fled. You flew to Heaven and begged forgiveness, promising repentance and swearing your loyalty, denouncing your life as a sinner and your relationship with the demon who had driven you to your Fall.

And by God, you were forgiven, and your sins were swept away along with all of your memories from your sinful life.

You became an angel once more, and you were happy.

But nothing lasts forever, especially not happiness. It wasn't long before you were forced into an encounter with another demon, this time a blind female with a horrible temper. And this demon, who you learned was named Honorine, happened to mention something that, despite your blanked memory, invoked the strangest sense of horror and pain in you.

Slowly, you began to remember.

She began to tease you about abandoning your mate, your Eyvindur. He hadn't known what to do without you once you had vanished, and so he eventually came under her care. There, he had gotten on her wrong side and she had punished him accordingly, in her own opinion.

Eyvindur was dead.

All at once, you remembered.

And as you remembered, your pain, your despair, multiplied.

He was dead because of you.

No, not because of you.

Because of her.

She

killed

him.

You remember little for several weeks after that. Splinters of memory occasionally arise, and all of them are the same: hatred. Anger.

You remember Falling again. This time, you know it's permanent.

You remember chasing her down.

Fighting her.

Trying again and again to kill her.

Your existence revolved around her now. Her, and trying to kill her. Taking your revenge on her and making her suffer, for Eyvindur. Even when you found your Evvy's reincarnation, a Hellraiser by the name of Uriah, you didn't stop chasing her. Even when Uriah told you to stop, when he reminded you that what had been done was done, you wouldn't stop. Even when your new Lord, Behemoth, gave you direct orders to stop. When the Elite Guards captured you and gave you warnings.

Eventually, even he stopped trying to change your mind.

Of course, your obsession obviously brought its own consequences. Your personality soured, and you became violent and jaded, convinced that nothing had meaning anymore. With every day that passed, you drifted further and further from Grace, until the thought of returning became little more than a laughable dream. You became the most ruthless Wrath demon in Hell, even compared to the Lords and the Princes of Vice.

You became a true demon.

And, one day, your obsession brought to you a dire consequence that very nearly cost you your life.

You hadn't been paying attention. He'd sneaked up behind you, cloaked in the chaos of war as you'd fought your hardest against your enemies.

The pain didn't shake you out of your violent stupor. What did was the blood, and the sight of your arm on the ground.

They sedated you before you could respond. Your memories after that are blurry; smears of color, warped yelling, trying to speak but finding your tongue too heavy to move.

When you woke up, you were lying in the hospital wing with bandages wrapped thickly around what was left of your arm, healers and colleagues surrounding you. By the time they sedated you again and tied you down, only the healers were left.

Now you found yourself lying in bed, thick straps holding you down and a slow drip of sedatives keeping you docile as the healers discuss what to do with you. Uriah is always with you, always sitting at your side, and always arguing with the healers as they claim you'll survive without your arm, that you don't need it to live. He argues your side, knowing your temperament, knowing how much you loathe the idea of living without your arm without even asking you your thoughts.

He knows you too well, and you don't even remember how. But you are thankful.

After all, you can't kill her without both hands to choke the life out of her.

**Author's Note:**

> Whee, crazy ex-angels!
> 
> Crappy writing, I know, and stupidly crappy ending, but I didn't know how else to end it. Might go on, but I dunno. So yeah.


End file.
